Source: President of South Africa –
Programme Director,
Premier of the Free State, Ms. Maqueen Letsoha Mathae,
Ministers and Deputy Ministers,
Members of Parliament and the provincial legislature,
Executive Mayor of the Mangaung Metropolitan Municipality, Cllr. Gregory Nthatisi,
Representatives of political parties,
Representatives of traditional, community and faith-based organisations and other civil society formations,
Representatives of the business community,
Delegates to the Men’s Indaba,
Guests,
Ladies and Gentlemen,
Dumelang. Avuxeni. Ndi Matsheloni. Lotjhani. Sanibonani. Goeie môre. Molweni.
It is my pleasure to be here with the brothers, fathers, grandfathers, uncles and sons of our nation.
To see you all gathered here; men from all walks of life, young and not so young, fills me with pride.
You are here because you recognise that violence against women and children is a pandemic, and a crisis that will destroy our nation if we do not stop it.
You are here because you are ready to stand up and be counted as men and boys who declare: Not in my Name.
We congratulate the provincial government for convening this Men’s Indaba.
We are meeting as South Africa and the world observes 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence.
The recent crime statistics for the first two quarters of the 2025/2026 financial year paint a worrying picture.
Despite there being a drop in serious crimes around the country – contact sexual offences and attempted sexual offences have gone up.
That means more women and girls, and even young boys, have been victims of sexual assault, rape and attempted rape.
Every day across this country, the safety and dignity of women and children is being undermined by the actions of violent men.
Bo ntate ba rona,
As I have said many times in the past, gender-based violence is not a problem of women.
Gender-based violence is the actions of men, and about the terrible crimes they commit. In the name of culture and tradition. In the name of proving their masculinity. In the name of all forms of justifications.
Minister Chikunga, Minister Tolashe, Minister Kubayi and Minister Cachalia have outlined the progress and actions that continue to be taken to support survivors of gender-based violence.
Earlier today for example, we opened a Sexual Offences Court at Botshabelo as part of ongoing work to support survivors and ensure they get justice for the crimes perpetrated against them.
But the reality is that we can talk the whole day about putting more police on the streets, about setting up more shelters, about procuring more evidence kits at stations, and making the criminal justice system more victim-centric.
Without directly engaging men–we will continue to have marches, hold protests and conduct social media campaigns; all led by women. And the statistics will not change.
I am not here to criticise all men.
We are here because we see you as the solution.
We have heard powerful testimony earlier from representatives of the men’s sector who shared their experiences, and for this we salute you all.
We know that across this country there are millions of good, decent men and boys who would never even consider abusing or hurting a woman – and that they are tired of being told all men are the problem.
You want your voices to be heard, to be respected, and to be trusted by not just the women and children in your lives, but by everyone.
Yet at the same time we know it is time for the men of this country to stop being on the sidelines.
Let us not think that our silence does not mean our complicity. Let us not assume that by looking away as another man abuses a woman we are not guilty too – because this crime continues to fester in a culture of silence.
What is the consequence of that silence?
Frightened children.
Terrified wives and girlfriends. Grieving mothers. And angry sons – watching, and learning.
This Men’s Indaba is a clear statement that we are no longer outsourcing the fight against GBV to women who are the victims.
We know that change begins with us.
A re bueng, let us talk openly here today.
It is not easy to be a man in society today.
Men are under pressure in the family, in our homes, in our communities, at school and in the workplaces.
South Africa has a crisis we don’t to speak about openly enough, and it is broken families.
The vast majority of children in South Africa don’t live with their biological fathers. This is a terrible tragedy.
The presence of a father in the home is important to shaping the attitudes and behaviour of boys, and that so many young boys in South Africa lack father figures is heartbreaking.
Yes, we know that not all fathers are good fathers.
Yes, we know that other men, stepfathers, partners of the mothers or extended family continue to play a role in the lives of many boys.
Yes, we know the role our history has played in breaking up families, particularly black families.
We must also acknowledge that there are many reasons why men desert the family unit, and that it is not always by choice.
But we must also speak the truth. Many men in this country are shirking their responsibilities to their children, leaving their mothers, grandparents and other caregivers to struggle alone with raising them.
More than 31 per cent of men are unemployed in our country today. When it comes to the youth unemployment rate, more than 36 per cent of young men don’t have work.
Young boys are increasingly dropping out of school. Four in ten learners are failing to finish school, and many of them are boys.
Boys are more likely to drop out of school because they are struggling academically, and because of peer pressure.
For many young men, being out of school has rendered them vulnerable to the allure of joining gangs to feel a sense of belonging, to substance abuse, and to crime.
Men and boys make up the vast majority of the population in detention centers, places of safety, and correctional facilities. Eighty seven per cent of murder victims in South Africa are men.
This is not about diminishing the impact of gender-based violence, or to imply that the suffering of one is above the other.
This is about acknowledging that South Africa has a violence problem, and in this environment, men are being socialised to prove themselves, to suppress their emotions, and to dominate.
Many men in this country are suffering from depression from being unemployed, from isolation and loneliness being separated from their families, and struggling with alcoholism and drug dependency.
The image is being pushed in communities, on television, on social media and virtually everywhere that violence is showing strength.
That treating women and girls a particular way shows you are ‘a man’ – and that being kind and compassionate makes you weak, a coward and a ‘simp.‘
Relationships have become a battleground. According to a survey on GBV published last year, a third of South African women have experienced physical violence in their lifetime, and most of the cases involve intimate partners.
More than 50 per cent of women surveyed had experienced psychological and emotional abuse. Again, in most cases the perpetrator was someone they were in a relationship with.
Most cases of femicide are committed by partners or ex-partners.
Abuse doesn’t only refer to bruises.
There are men preying on girls young enough to be their daughters, buying groceries for the childrens’ families to buy their silence.
There are the older men and men in positions of authority throwing their money around in nightclubs and functions to practically buy young girls that they derogatorily refer to as ‘istoko.’
There is the taking advantage of girls by their male classmates, who pressure them to send intimate pictures that are used to blackmail them.
There are men and boys who have problems with alcohol and substance abuse who terrorise their mothers and grandmothers, stealing their money and possessions for their next fix.
The abusers of women and children live among us. They are fathers, our sons, our grandfathers, uncles, cousins and friends.
And these things aren’t happening in some faraway places, they are happening in our schools, at places of worship, at workplaces, at places of higher learning, in nightclubs, and in homes.
And most shamefully, when they happen, other men look away.
Today we must be brave enough to say that whether it is physical, mental, economic and other forms of abuse of women and girls – they are all abuse.
As men we need to ask ourselves what are the deep-rooted attitudes we have towards women and girls that is fuelling this kind of behavior: and once we recognise them, to ask for help.
The toxic masculinity that is driving the abuse of women and children is a direct by-product of the violent society in which we live.
The men of this country, facing joblessness, lack of education, unable to provide for their families, and finding little support for their own struggles with alcoholism, substance abuse – are turning on women and children.
Let me be clear, there is no justification for gender-based violence.
But this Men’s Indaba must critically interrogate these issues, and lead the way for the country in reimagining what it means to be a man in South Africa today.
We need Men’s Indaba’s and organised dialogues with men and boys across the country, with regularity, not just during the 16 Days of Activism campaign.
These engagements must provide men and boys with a safe space to be vulnerable and to be honest, without being stereotyped as abusers or potential abusers.
There needs to be open and honest dialogue around what the conditions are making men turn to acts of violence.
On what support mechanisms need to be put in place to support and help men and boys who are struggling.
On counselling and other forms of psych-social support that is needed for young boys in school, as part of prevention efforts.
On the rehabilitation of GBV offenders so we can break the cycle of violence once and for all.
It does not help the cause against gender-based violence that we are only intervening once perpetrators have already entered the criminal justice system; prevention efforts must begin in the family, and in communities.
All of society must be part of this effort, and support vulnerable men and boys who are often too ashamed to ask for help.
South Africa does not need a so-called new generation of men. It needs the men and boys of this generation to do better, and to be better.
South Africa needs men who have respect for women, who are compassionate, accountable, and strong in character, not with their fists.
We need men who are protectors of women, not perpetrators.
We need men who are role models to other men in how they engage with and treat women and girls.
We need men who call out the ill-treatment of women by other men, and report crimes committed against women and girls.
Men of South Africa,
I call on you to stand up and be counted.
Let us say resoundingly, Not in our Name.
GBV will fall when men rise. Not in violence, but in respect, courage and accountability.
Let us leave here not only informed, but transformed.
I thank you.
